We live. We love. We enjoy life. But nothing could prepare me, no amount of weekly fruit comparison charts, no binge watching of OBEM, no carb craving face stuffings, for what was about to happen. The anticipation was crazy. I should have known, just like his father on our first date, he would keep me waiting. Lots of walking, cervix softening pessaries, pineapple, curries and all the rest of it.
11 Days later i held my son for the first time. I was overwhelmed, emotional, exhausted and proud to be a mum. His mum.
He filled my heart with an energy and a smile i still have to this day. Don’t get me wrong, some days i literally want to hide under my duvet and figure out how and why i find myself here. How did i ‘lose’ my independence and why did i decide this was a good idea?!
But then i hear the patter of feet, a flying super hero jump on my head and life as i know it is restored.
It has been a struggle to get here. To find a path and a rhythm and a sense of self i am comfortable with. That ‘balance’ everyone talks about. The ‘bounce’ back body yet with seemingly no time for yourself.
I am fortunate that i have such an honest and amazing husband and family. I literally take each day as it comes and don’t put so pressure on myself to be the latest ‘instagram’ mum or chocolate box family. It is hard not to get consumed but having the focus from my journey into pregnancy and post natal teacher training helped me with this immeasurably.
Being able to document my family and journey into motherhood through my eyes has offered me a timeless, slow mo snippet of this crazy whirlwind i am living.
My training took me on an amazingly spiritual, mind messing, personal empowering journey. I quickly realised what i wanted from this and what i wanted to offer other mamas to be. It isn’t all the glitz and glam, with the glowing shiny hair, the pain free ‘zen’ water births. Shit gets real and real quick from the minute you realise you are pregnant. Elation, panic, fear, excitement and puking. The uniqueness is as real as you or i. But this is the point in which i believe the support, the empowerment, the trust, the love and the circle of womanhood takes over. This is how a difference can be made. From a day, or a year, to a life.
More and more we are hearing about mental health, including that of post natal depression. Having a little support network can make a big difference. Just knowing someone else is going through something similar can take our mind to a place of comfort rather than anxiety.
Throughout my classes – both pregnancy and post natal, i offer an open and honest space for sharing. The constant understanding of my own personal struggle has afforded me the ability to share, listen and sign post my ladies to networks of support and love.
This journey has only just begun and i am excited to find my feet as i go.
No pressure, no expectations. Simple.
It would be my pleasure to be part of yours.